It has been a year today since Sadie, Sadiekins, Sadie Pants, Sadie Girl and about a half a dozen other names she was known by left us for Rainbow Bridge. There is still a giant hole in my heart, that I do not think will ever be filled until I get to pick her up and hug her again on that fateful day when I get to see her at the Rainbow Bridge.
It has taken some time to sit and write about it due to an out of state move with nine other animals all while renovating the house we were moving to. Along the way there have been many signs and synchronicities that let me know beyond a shadow of a doubt that our little Sadie Girl was indeed safe at Rainbow Bridge and peaceful.
Many people have followed not only my music on social media but also my animals. I mean after all, how could you miss it? I am always plastering pics and videos of them all around. For anyone who is new or may have missed Sadie’s part in my life, I wanted to share her rescue story and how her life changed because of being rescued… this is her story.
It all started because I love animals. Even though I have plenty, and do not ever need any more, I just cannot seem to help myself when I hear of a furkid in dire straights. This is always the case, and in this instance, we need to go back to April of 2014 where Sadie’s rescue adventure all started.
In April of 2014 the Mr. (who should be sainted many times over for not putting me in a garbage can for always bringing more animals into our lives) and I had four dogs. Pookie, Punkin, Bobo & Pepe. Life was pretty simple compared to now with the seven cats and three dogs in our current pack incarnation. A rescue that I followed on social media was sponsoring an adoption event nearby in New Jersey. It was an event mixed with arts, crafts, vendors and it being a Saturday afternoon with not much going on, we decided to go.
We were walking around taking it all in, there were several rescues there that day. Each one had dogs that were up for adoption with them. Being the animal nut that I am, I was busy stopping to pet and talk to all of the dogs that we saw. It was innocent enough, I stopped did our thing and we moved on. We checked out the crafts and bought a few things. We made some donations to different rescues, and were making our way to the exit when I saw her.
She was with one of the last rescues we saw that day, there was a wire crate with a sad, depressed looking gray and white dog laying in the crate. She was facing the opposite direction. I bent down to talk to her, and she did not turn around. She was flat out, her little head on the crate floor almost like she had given up. I persisted. I tried to get her attention by talking in my best high pitched cutesy animal tone… she would not budge. Finally she turned around and looked at me, then turned back to the opposite direction. I again started talking to her, telling her she was a pretty girl, Hello, etc. Then all of the sudden she whipped her little body around with a happy face almost as if she was saying “Are you talking to ME”? I asked if she could come out of the crate so I could pet her… before I knew it she was out and her butt was wiggling so fast and her smile was so big it broke my heart.
I knew that if I asked the Mr. if we could consider taking her, he would most definitely had me committed to an insane asylum. See, we had previously foster failed with Pepe, whom many followed for a long time and he was, well lets just say one of his nicknames was Pepe-laden (as in Bin Laden). He mellowed with his old age but when we rescued him with the intent to just foster but ended up adopting due his many quirks needing a very understanding home when he was ten from the NYC ACC having been horribly abuse it took much time, effort and adjusting to get him to feel safe, and fit into our little pack. So, I know that just two years after that, if I had asked my Mr. To get this little girl he would most understandably had said NO.
I played with her for a bit and took her for a mini walk. I took her back to her crate, got the rescue’s information and set my mind on finding this little girl a home. I told her I would help her find a momma and daddy, and then said goodbye.
On the way home I told my mom about her. If anyone wonders where I got my love of animals from, it comes from her. This is a woman who is outside in two feet of snow in a snow storm blowing off her back deck for her feral cats, which all have heated shelters, heated water bowls and she heats up their wet food in the winter.
At the time she had two dogs and one cat inside. She said she would mention it to her work friend. Weeks went by and her friend was on the fence about Sadie. Then out of the blue one day, my mom asked me about her again. Had she been adopted yet, yada yada… I checked the rescue and she was still sitting in a crate in NJ waiting. So my mom blurted out, “I want her”. She then hatched a plot to get her, in which her my step dad would not have a chance to say no, and my husband was sworn to secrecy, and so we were onto the mission.
Mom lived two and half hours away and was planning to visit for Memorial Day weekend. That Saturday, mom and I went off to do some “errands”. Errands meaning, mom and I drove the twenty some odd miles down to New Jersey where Sadie was, and mom adopted her. We then took her shopping for some necessities, and we came home to give her a much over due bath.
We got home and my step dad and husband were cutting some trees down outside. We had Sadie down in the finished basement where we did grooming, and had set up a table in the garage to blow-dry her. My step dad walked by the garage window and could see us inside with Sadie. He says to my husband, “hey those two are in there with a new dog”… My husband just smiled and acted surprised, and chalked it up to another episode of mom and I just completing another hair brained scheme.
We took Sadie to the Vet the following day and the rest is history. She was mom’s dog at first. She always visited very often, mom at our house, us at mom’s house. She was referred to as “Cousin Sadie” for many years. When mom would go away for work, we would babysit her. She was one of the gang. However, when mom’s other two dogs passed something changed for little Sadie. The separation anxiety that she always had became extreme in nature.
So when it was just her the only remaining dog at mom’s house, she was literally unable to be alone, ever. She would destroy crates or bags to get out. She would shake and tremble uncontrollably. She had every medical test known to man, and had tried most every anti anxiety medication and natural remedy. Nothing seemed to help.
There was one exception, when she was at our house. For some reason when Sadie was around our dogs and in our care, she did not act this way. We attributed it to her maybe not wanting to without other dogs around. So after going back and forth a few times, staying for many months at a time, from 2020; she finally came to stay for good in January of 2022.
She was approximately four to six years old when she was rescued. We have no idea when she was actually born, but by this time in January of 2022 at this time she would have been at the youngest twelve. Sadie had many medical issues that were always attended to. It was a lot of time, effort and care making sure that she felt safe and happy. I became her caretaker. Much more than just the regular taking care of an animal. There were multiple regular vet visits to manage her glaucoma, and eventually eye removal. She had liver disease and arthritis. I gave her tons of natural supplements to help her feel good. There was so much that went into making her feel safe and content, we literally arranged our entire days around her. We also had multiple Wholetones frequency music pet machines around the house. To help her and the other dogs feel safe. It was both challenging and rewarding to care for her. Many people do not understand the emotional awareness that animals have. There have been many studies done that show that they feel all of the same emotions that we do. They get happy, sad, they grieve, all just like we do. So when some people choose to abandon their pets, or not provide special care in their twilight years it really disturbs me. It is the exact time that they need their people the most.
It is a balance. Caring for a senior pet, and knowing when it is time to let them cross to Rainbow Bridge, peacefully and with dignity. Many people think in innocence that they will just peacefully “go in their sleep”. Although as nice as that would be, it is most often times not the case. When pets are senior there are most often times medical issues, and when left to take their natural course, is not peaceful at all. If a pet passes this way, there is a good chance that the pet suffered. That is something that I could never live with. So in our family, we watch and monitor the pets quality of life.
Can they still enjoy living. Do they eat food willingly, can they hold themselves up to do their business, do they stay with you, or are they starting to sleep alone? Away from humans or the pack? There are many signs that tell a human when it is time. Sadly, many ignore those signs or do not notice until it is way beyond comfort for the animal. It is hard, because I never want to say goodbye, ever. However, as a responsible pet owner, I have to put my own feelings and needs aside, and ask myself questions that are putting the animals needs above my own. When the answers indicate that the animal is just existing and living is more of a chore for them that an enjoyment, I know that it is time.
Thankfully, we have an amazing caring Veterinarian who makes home visits. When crossed at home, the pet is comfortable knows the smells, can be in their own bed, and go peacefully surrounded by the familiar vs. a cold, sterile vet’s office. Naturally because I never want to say goodbye, I tend to make appointments for her to come and then cancel or postpone. Sadie’s time was no different. I made an appointment then cancelled. Due to cancelling, looming weather, and a big giant move to another state with our nine other pets, this caused us to have to bring Sadie to the Vet’s office, or it would not have been done before we moved.
This was a very hard decision for me to make. As I was more than her caretaker, or her sister as my mom called me. She really became like a child to me. More-so than most all of my other pets. Mostly because she needed so much care. There is a bond that forms when caring for an elderly pet. Sadie was at this point losing the vision in her remaining eye, and was highly stressed in new locations. I am over simplifying for the sake of the story, but we did not want to put her through he stress of dismantling the home she knew and loved then going to a strange place. So off to the vet I went. Alone…
The Mr. had been staying at the new house renovating since we closed a few months prior, and I was at home caring for the animals. I went back and forth in my mind and over and over should I do it, do I cancel again?… I consulted mom. She said no, do not cancel.
So I asked our good friend Dave if he could meet me at the vet so I would not be alone. He was a trooper. He had never had to do this before and I was so appreciative that he was willing to come with me, and then to drive her to the Creamatory afterwards. She went in her little eyelash donut bed and was held, loved on, and sang to the entire time.
When I returned home, by that time it was early evening, February 11th 2024. I was naturally very sad and wondering and questioning if I had made the right decision. We always have spa music or whole tones playing all over the house, there is literally music in every room. In our bedroom the television was on Pandora “Snatam Kaur” channel, which is a relaxing beautiful spiritual music channel. I was folding laundry in our room and not facing the TV. I was pretty familiar with most of the songs that would play. Suddenly I heard a beautiful song that I had never heard before. I turned to look at the TV, and this is what I saw… “And Now He Has Wings, The Water Poem” by Ram Dass. It is a collection from Ram Dass of gorgeous songs about the passing of his infant son. The photo was a man reaching to the sky, his hand touching the clouds and a little bird flying in the cloud. I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that, that was Sadie giving me a sign, to let me know that she was indeed at Rainbow Bridge safe in the care our our Creator.
Since that night, it has happened many many times, in fact it never really fails. I will be thinking of her, and bam the song comes on. I am about to start feeing the dogs, boom it comes on. I get in the car about to go somewhere and there she is on my car computer screen on Pandora, it is almost like whenever my heart starts to miss her, she stops by to tell me that she is OK and not to worry. I know they are signs from my Sadie Girl.
I miss her so much. She had a beautiful life, she was dressed up in Halloween & Christmas Costumes, was spoiled beyond imagination and lived many happy years with us. But I miss her little trot, the way she smiled at me, her cute little bunny butt, seeing her sleeping happy and content in a puffy bed, there is not a day that goes by that I do not think of her, or all of the other furkids who are no longer with us and are now at Rainbow Bridge. My comfort rests in the knowing that I will see Sadie and all of my furkids again one day in heaven.
The moral of the story is, don’t shop adopt. There are literally millions of little Sadie’s out there sitting in rescues or shelters just waiting to live out their second chance. Hug your furkids while you have them, their time here on earth is so brief. Remember our animals might be a part of our world, but to them, we are their entire world.
Blessings, Love & Music ~
Ava xo
