A New Greek Phone Hacking Scandal

Many bloggers spend countless hours upon hours trying to figure out the best way to get more eyeballs on the words they write. After all, what's the use of writing a blog unless a lot of other people are reading it?

So, give the Greek blonde girl, (yours truly) some credit for possibly coming up with a brilliant new way of developing current topics for my blog. Yep, I decided to go Rupert Murdoch on a bunch of famous people and start hacking their cell phones!

I'm not sure what I would write for each post, but here are some of the cell phones I hacked and some of the conversations I overheard during my hacking:

Mark Zuckerberg- Called Bank of America and complained. He thought there was possible fraud on his checking account. Mark said he is missing about $5 Billion dollars from his account in the last few days.

Danica Patrica - Called Yoko Ono and said, "I am more popular than the Beatles!"

Barack Obama - Called Allied Van Lines and asked for a quote for a move from Washington D.C. to Chicago. When the moving company asked if he had a date in mind for the move, Mr. Obama said, "Shortly after November."

New York Mayor Bloomberg - Called 7-11 and said they need to change the name of their signature hotdogs. he said he won't allow them to be called "Big Bites."

Phillip Phillips - Called Rolling Stone magazine and asked if they wanted an interview with him? They asked him, "Who are you?" Phillip told them that he was the most recent winner of American Idol. The reporter at Rolling Stone told him that they quit writing about the winners on American Idol after their story on Kris Allen in 2009. Phillip said, "Kris Allen? Who's that?" The reporter said, "Exactly!"

Mr. Bricks - Called the McDonald's headquarters and complained that the McRib wasn't on the menu anymore. They apologized to him for the inconvience and told him that some fat man, with googly eyes, in Hollywood, ate them all. Mr. Bricks said, "Well technically, I have only one eye that googles."

Bethenny Frankel- Called the Governor of Wyoming and told him that she had just bought the entire state of Wyoming. And when the Governor asked Bethenny why Wyoming, she said, "She was bored, wanted to spend some money and besides, it wasn't as expensive as Rhode Island."

Kim Kardashian -  Called Kanye West and asked if he thought that her cell phone made her butt look fat? Kanye responded, "Yes, but that's Ok, because I like a 4g Butt."

OK, maybe I really didn't hack into anyone's cell phone... but hey at least I was able to create another blog post, and probably made ya laugh!  Score one for the Greek girl.

Blessings, Love & Music ~

Ava
www.avaaston.com 

The Brady Bunch

Tom Brady and the Brady Bunch

It's 8pm and the coin toss is just minutes away.  With millions of Tebow fans around the world Tebowing in their living rooms I sit in the dark clutching my Vitamin Water Zero as I wait to watch what I know is inevitably about to occur: a debacle on the Denver Bronco's.  Yup, you guessed it, I am a Patriots fan.  Sorry.....  and even I love Tim Tebow, he is amazing.  However if it comes down to the two teams, I just have to stay tried and true to my boys in silver and blue.

Here we have football from the mind of a girl, (a Greek blonde Girl that is):

1st Quarter:

Tom Brady (aka Mr. Bunchen) strides out leading his team to the field.  Denver wins the coin toss.  Meanwhile I indulge in a healthy snack platter as I watch the Patriots chalk two touchdowns on the board faster than my manager Mr. Bricks can scarf down a McRib.

Commercial break.  OK time to check my Ebay app on my iPhone.  Low and behold I'm about to score a touchdown of my own as I pitch my bid on a bottle of my favorite Channel Parfum, Allure.  With only 1 minute to go I end up winning!  TOUCHDOWN!

2nd Quarter:

The Brady Bunch takes it to the Bronco's and I think I see Tebow underneath about a dozen Patriots, inside voice - "please God make them stop stomping on Tim Tebow".  I know this is so hard, I love my Pats, but I love Tim Tebow too.... rrhhrrh I almost think the Patriots started to feel bad too - as the Bronco's scored one touchdown.  Then only to answer them back Mr. Bunchen (Tom Brady) decides to toss in not 1 or 2 but 3 more touchdowns.  So I get bored for a minute.  I decide to prank Mr. Brick's by sending him a pic of me with my hair pulled back and tell him I cut it into a 'bob'.

Halftime -

Mr. Brick's texts me in a total frenzy.  He insists on Skyping me from across the globe to see my new "hairdo".  Ut Oh.... he does not sound amused.... yup he's pretty much flipping out. I text him and say I was only kidding.  Oops the Patriots are back on the field now.

I tell Bricks not to worry and I will skype him after the game.  The phone rings.  It's him.  Oh geeze.  Can't a girl watch a game without being interrupted.  It's okay because at this point I feel so bad for the Bronco's I can't take it.  So I answer the Skype call.  Mr. Bricks who is visiting his ailing Aunt in east-yu-peepee is nearly freaking out before I show him I would never cut my locks off.  He lets out a gasp, and it's a good thing I told him or it could have landed him into a McRib induced coma.

- Now back to the game.

Tom tosses yet another TD pass.  In goes the Patriots into a 42 to 7 lead.  Oh and the Bronco's score a 3 point field goal.  What's that?  Someone tagged me in a political photo on Facebook?  Okay, gotta login now and delete the tag... grrr.  Meanwhile I stop to see Laura Kaeppeler from Wisconsin was just crowned Miss America, (love the dress btw).

Back at the game.

Here we see Tebow tebowing yet again but this time its because he's getting up from being sacked his 6th time of the game.  What in the world?  I just can't wrap my noggin around this.  I have to have a hot beverage.  So I pour myself a k-cup cup-o-coffee/hot chocolate and top it off with whip cream.  My Brady Bunch is destroying the Bronco's & I feel so bad I can't even enjoy it! 

4th Quarter:

I text Mr. Bricks to see if he's watching the game.  He say's "no. I don't like soccer."  This leads me to believe he's kidding.  But then a few texts later I get to the bottom of it and realize Mr. Bricks failed in gym class.  He's not a sports fan.  That is unless you consider Nascar a sport.  He's got a thing for Danica Patrick apparently.  I am starting to think he spends more time watching her car go round the racetrack more than he is trying to get me my record deal....

Then before you know it, it looks like the Patriots have just about wrapped up what is by far one of the greatest games I have ever seen.  45-10 in a blowout game that set all kinds of records, now if we can just have a repeat next week.  Don't get me wrong, I am all for Tim Tebow.  He is an amazing athlete and most importantly a class act.  It was really hard to watch my favorite team beat the Broncos so badly.  However, in sports just like in life sometimes we're up and sometimes we're down.  The most important thing to remember is to always be who you are no matter what is happening on the field.  Just like the sports casters said, "Tim Tebow" will be back next year with a vengeance.  In the meantime it's on to the playoffs and God willing, onto the Superbowl for my Brady Bunch!         

Blessings, Love & Music ~
Ava xox :D
www.avaaston.com 

Merry Christmas

Ava the Diva Celebrates Christmas With Mr. Bricks

Merry Christmas Friends!  Hope you enjoy the "Ava the Diva" Christmas episode & that you all have a beautiful Holiday & a New Year that is blessed beyond measure!

Blessings, Love & Music ~

Ava xox
www.avaaston.com

PS - To help make my Christmas Wish come true, please visit my kickstarter campaign & pledge.  Every pledge comes with my music & exclusive rewards, every pledge counts,
as low as $1.00 song download!
  

Click here to learn about my KickStarter.com Campaign and how you can get involved.

Happy Halloween - They're Ba-ack!

They're Ba-ack! That's right the McRib sandwich is back just in time for Mr. Bricks to scare Ava the Diva by almost killing himself.  That's right, Ava the Diva and Mr. Bricks have one of the most mucked up Halloween's ever.  


It all started when Mr. Bricks was driving his trusty companion Sunny the dog to the groomer when he saw that McDonald's was featuring the "McRib" sandwich...  and we all know what happens to Mr. Bricks when a McRib is in sight. So in an effort to avoid missing out on this short lived opportunity Mr. Bricks decided he would stop in for a bite or two or ten!  So, tune in and and see what happens when Ava finds Mr. Bricks on Halloween.

Blessings, Love & Music ~
Ava xox
www.avaaston.com

Help me support our wounded hero's and their families.

All In A Days Work

It’s Saturday Morning Cartoon Time with Ava The Diva and Mr. Bricks.
Watch as Ava uses her time wisely in this funny segment of “A Day in the Life of Ava the Diva”

Blessings, Love & Music,
Ava xo

www.avaaston.com

Harry Potter

Everything Must Come to an End.

Unless you have been living under a rock like the guy in the GIECO commercial (and if you don't know what GIECO commercial I'm talking about then you really do live under a rock), Harry Potter is coming to an end tomorrow.  Cue the somber violin music... I must admit I did watch the first and second installments, then after that I kind of lost track. Hey I'm just being honest :D

When I saw the previews for this new one I realized I just had to run to Blockbuster and rent the entire installment of movies I have not seen. Then I could have an all-day/night movie marathon.  Of course I would have to do it with a troth of popcorn (Orville Redenbacker's Lite Popcorn of course) and a case of Go-Go flavored Vitamin Water zero, a pot of coffee for the late showings and a bag of peanut butter M&M's.  Now of course I have yet to do this. Why? Well procrastination of course.

Regardless, the fact that this movie represents an end to not just a series or a group of characters but an actual end to an era.  We have spent the last decade+ watching these characters quite literally grow up.  This brings me to something of what I call an "Ava The Greek Philosopher Aston Moment."  As we draw to the end of this era and this series it reminds me how important and powerful endings can be.  Sometimes in life like in films we have two types of endings: The Hollywood ending and the Independent Filmmaker ending.  The Hollywood ending is the one where the Hero gets the girl and saves the day as they all ride of in the sunset.  The Independent filmmaker leaves the audience wondering what the hell just happened and why did the dog have to die?  My point as abstract as it is, is that we can choose to embrace an ending or reject it.  So often we want to re-write the ending of those films and we can't.  Other times we wish our story had ended just as was on the big screen, but it didn't.  The great thing is that we have the ability to change our endings.

Okay, here's my point: We don't know how Harry Potter will end, until we watch it.  The great thing is when it's written well enough we as an audience can continue dreaming up what will happen even though the credits roll.  So just like in life we sometimes accept the so-called "ending" in a situation, a season, a time, a job or even a relationship at it's face value.  I mean unless you are playing my music - that is what the repeat button is for, just sayin'.

So next time you find yourself facing down some evil warlock and all that stands between you and your destiny is a little magical stick, you have the ability to choose how you embrace the ending.  Just don't leave the audience wondering, "what the heck just happened?"

Blessings, Love & Music,
Ava xo

www.avaaston.com

I Can See Clearly Now

Excuse me officer, but does this car look like the vehicle a gangster would be driving, now really?....

Picture this:

"Beep-Beep" goes my keyfob unlocking my blue 5-Speed Jetta.  It sits quietly as I approach it with a gleeful grin & a glint in my eye.  I relish in it's shiny blueness as I clutch my iced cup of happiness in one hand & cling to door handle with the other, I enter.

Once inside I breath in deep the fresh new-car smell.  I just love my new car "Johnny Jetta", (of course if Mr. Bricks would get off of his duff and finally get me a record deal I could go buy my dream car the Bumble Bee Camaro) until then, Johnny Jetta does the job. I insert the key and turn the leather bound steering wheel with a simultaneous press on the clutch.  In it goes, I engage the shift, & in a moments notice I am moving.  I find myself driving in full granny mode (as I always do, because I was in a really bad car crash in high school, ever since then I realized life is too short & a car is not a toy), on a beautiful sunset road.  Goo Goo Dolls, fill my speakers followed by Heart, Rob Thomas, Switchfoot & P.O.D. thanks to my iPod shuffle.  I'm enjoying my favorite time of day, "Magic Hour".  It's industry lingo for that perfect time where everything turns shades of purple and orange from the glowing sunset on the horizon.

Out of nowhere, low and behold wha-wha-what? A cop? Pulling me over? Me? The Greek Girl, I drive like a granny for crying out loud.... Seriously?  Does he not know it's Ava Aston?  Maybe he want's my autograph?  But he can't tell it's me because I have tinted windows for privacy reasons because it keeps the gawkers at bay.

Me: Is there a problem officer?

Officer: License and registration?

Me: What did you pull me over for?  I wasn't doing anything?

Officer: What's with the attitude ma'am?

Me: Excuse me?  You are the one walking up to my car like I am a drug dealer?  I wasn't doing anything wrong?

Officer: I pulled you over because I couldn't see you?

Me: Then how did you pull me over?  Obviously you saw me well enough to pull me over?

Officer: Your windows ma'am?  I couldn't see you through your windows.  They are too dark.

Me: Too dark? And can you please stop calling me ma'am?  I'm not my mom for crying out loud.

Officer: Ma'am.  I am going to ask you to step out of the vehicle.

(Okay, now this is where it get's interesting as my head nearly spins off like the exorcist.)

Me: What? Are you friggin kidding me? I am not getting out of my car!

Officer: Ma'am, please step out of the vehicle or I will be forced to arrest you.

Me: Arrest me?!? for what? Because you couldn't see me?  Do you know who I am?

Officer: No and I don't care.  Please step out of the vehicle now ma'am.

(So now I get out.  Oh and by the way, did I mention he called for a backup?  Whatever.)

Officer: I will be right back ma'am.

What the? Now I am out of my car in the hot air with my hair starting to wilt and the smell of diesel trucks overpowering my Chanel "Chance Fresh" perfume I just squirted on me.  There I stood for 15 minutes while this super-cop played the "cool-kid" card.  I am telling you what, nothing bugs me more than a cop with a chip on his shoulder and he had one alright.

Two tickets later for having "tinted windows" I am seeing clearly now.  Apparently there is a law in NYS where Cars, (not SUV's mind you because they are exempt) cars side windows must allow 70% of light in.... Cops must be able to see you and what you are doing inside the car.  Hmmmph.  So I'm wondering... are the police going to come and ask me to take down my curtains in my house now, because they can't see what's going on inside? I don't think this makes any sense. And this my friends is what I like to call an episode of "total muckery"....  just sayin.

Blessings,
Ava  xox

12 Angry Men

The Twelve Angry Men have left the building and the jury has decided, "not guilty".

Ok, so I am flipping through the channels and I find there is this new reality series on called the "Casey Anthony Trial".  I am thinking cool, "Something to sooth my noggin in between reruns of The Mob Wives and The Real Housewives of Atlanta".  Then it dawns on me, this is a real case, where a mom is being tried for killing her two-year-old daughter. What!?! I can not believe some of the things coming out of that court room and feeling sad to see such a messed up family while at the same time thinking are you for real?  That is just crazy!  What in the world would drive someone to do such a thing? Then something else totally not normal would pop up and there my noggin goes again. So now I am glued to the tube with popcorn in one hand and Vitamin Water Zero in the other.

Then it turns out that during this whole saga the main focus is on what the Jury will decide and all I can think is, what do they look like?  They never show you who is on the jury during the case, so I am told.  (I did look it up on Snopes Don'tcha know.)  Anyway, so I am sitting there listening to Geraldo Rivera dissect the case like a madman when I realized what agony it must be for these 12 people and their alternates.  Sure it must be fun and exciting to some degree to sit in on an internationally known court case, but can you imagine having to be forced to sit next to someone every single day all day long for 6 weeks? Seriously, all I could think was, "What if I get picked for jury duty to decide if someone dies or not and all the while I have to sit next to someone like Mr. Bricks for 6 weeks".  I would probably be the poster child for what they define as a hung jury, just sayin'.

Seriously though, this whole process of being a juror is something I am sure glad I have never had to do. Well officially that is. There was the threat that if I had attempted to put it off one more time or not show up for that matter, there would be a bounty out for me with a bench warrant for my arrest.  I mean seriously don't they realize I am busy going to auditions, writing songs and working out? Besides have you seen this Greek blonde girl?  I don't think you would want me deciding your fate.  I have two points against me, I didn't pay attention in my law classes in high school and I can't stand stupidity.  So if you come across as being one of those criminals (who by the way are stupid) I am going to convict you.  I just am not having it.  Not to mention I would be one heck of an angry juror because I am being forced to sit next to Mr. Bricks and try to avoid his lazy eye.

All I am saying is, I am glad I didn't make it to being a selected juror because I can tell you for sure, they would have to make a remake to that classic film and call it "One Angry Greek Blonde Juror" and I can tell you how it would end, they all would not pass go and would not collect $200.  They would be going to the clink with no chance of a get out of jail free card, guilty or not.  If you waste my time by putting me in the juror box I might just implode and that my blog friends is a promise.

Blessings,

Ava xo

P/S: You can't wear sneakers in jury duty.  That is mucked up for real.

Fireworks

Amazing :D

NOTE: IN THE SPIRIT OF THE 4TH OF JULY HOLIDAY AND TO KEEP MY NOGGIN SAFE AND SANE, I WILL NOT BE POSTING A NEW BLOG UNTIL TUESDAY JULY 6TH! 


So.... What are you going to do for 4th of July?  That seems to be the big question on everyone's mind the last week or so.  No need to ask what old man Brick's will be doing, I'm sure he will do like he always does, wear his circa 1986 white jeans and make a trip to Mc Donald's.  But wait a minute, he does that every day, so what makes that special for the 4th of July?... hmmmm

What is the Greek Blonde Girl gonna do for the 4th of July?  I have a nice muckery free weekend planned.  I am going to do what any red blooded american girl would do ~ and go shopping of course!  The 4th of July is a great time to putz around my favorite outlet mall and find treasures.  I also like to hit a good TJ Max (since I am a Maxinista afterall), Marshall's, and more than likely will make a trip to Kohls.

Unless I am out of town doing a show or an acting job, when I am at home in the Hudson Valley (just outside NYC)  I pretty much have a few things I regularly do when the 4th of July rolls around.  Since it is America's birthday the only proper thing to do is have a slice of Apple pie, don't mind if I do. ;D One of the weekend days I like to spend doing yard work.  Yes I have to do my own yard work, and yes I know if Mr. Bricks would hurry up and get me a record deal I would have someone to do the yard work for me. Until then, it's greek gardening 101 at the Aston House.  Since I'm severley allergic to poison ivy/oak/sumack that grows amuck in my yard, I always have to be uber careful to wear gloves, and try my darndest not to touch anything the gloves touched (always easier said than done).  Even though I rarely make it through a summer without an episode of it, I just can not resist the urge to get out and make the flower beds looks pretty.

After yard work is done, I usually find time to get in a good run, a few hours laying in the sun, and having a cookout with family & friends.  The following day I like to spend shopping. Who doesn't love a good sale & hitting Woodbury Commons just makes me giddy.  There are tons of of my favorite stores there: Coach, Nike, Michael Kors, Burberry, Kenneth Cole, and it's outside so it is a great way to spend the day.  Walking, shopping, enjoying the fresh air, and they have an ice cream & hot dog stand.... hello!!! Yes we all know I'm a health nut and normally eat super healthy, but hey it's 4th of July, I work out like a maniac and a kiddie size ice cream and one hot dog with mustard & sauerkraut never killed anyone.  Everything in moderation, right. Well, that is everything except shopping.  Kidding. ;D

Depending on when I get shopped out, hitting a good movie always makes me smile.  I'm really looking forward to seeing The New Transformers movie, Dark of the Moon !! Everyone knows how much I love the Bumble Bee Camaro... and the characters Bumble Bee & Optimus Prime are two of my favorites!!! Can't wait to see what happens in this installment!

Last but not least.... No matter where I happen to be on the 4th of July, I HAVE to see fireworks.  It's not negotiable... it's just not.  4th of July = fireworks, it is that simple! I love America & there is nothing more American than seeing a gorgeous display of fireworks on the 4th of July... and there is no place I love watching it more than the annual Macy's 4th of July Fireworks Spectacular!  I like to find a remote secluded spot to watch on my car from the Jersey side of the Hudson. Who wants to be stuck in traffic after they're done right?....  I can't think of a better way to round out the holiday weekend than to lay on top of my car enjoying the view and reflecting on all the fun of the weekend.

So what's on your agenda?  Whatever it is, I hope you have a safe, fun & wonderful Holiday!

Love & Music ~
Ava :D xox

Whistle While You Work

My producer Damien & I in the studio, he sure is one funny guy...

Do you have one of the jobs where you sit a cubicle all day and listen to the person next to you whistle all day? That would make my coconut explode. Then there are those Cubicle A-Type  Personality Dwellers (CADS) that you can hear their every perfect phone conversation  with every girl with a heart beat who this CAD has buffaloed into thinking she was special.  Makes you want to sprint into his cubicle when he takes one of his frequent breaks to visit the bathroom so he can check himself out in the mirror and hit redial on his phone and tell the unsuspecting lady just what a jerk this guy is.

I am lucky, the only cubicle at my job is the recording booth....  The only thing I have to listen to is the sound of my own melodies & my producer Damien saying "That's Hot". Which is actually quite funny, because he is a big guy with a wicked sense of humor which makes for lots of goofing around at times.  But hey, like they say "if you can't laugh... you might as well be 6 ft under".  I know I don't want to be there anytime soon, so I plan to keep on laughing.  So I hope you enjoy the little clip of Damien & I doing just that, goofing around while working on a new song.  Looking to have this song finished mid July and God willing a whole new project done by my B~day in September.

Have a beautiful blessed day my blog buddies!

Ava xox

Cap'n Crunch Walks the Plank

A breakfast with this is not Greek Girl approved

Have you ever noticed how guys can not just eat one bowl of breakfast cereal? Well, I am going to appoint myself as the Czar of  Breakfast Stuff (BS) and let you know that you should not be listening to those BS commercials.  Otherwise you will have to Leggo the Greek Girl's Eggo, just sayin'.

I know I know I am always harping about "you are what you eat", but really I can not say it enough. It's OK to have a bit of "bad foods" once in a while but really.... Capt'n Crunch for breakfast? Not so much, it is more like a dessert... and like a handful, not a bowl.  Sorry to burst anyone's sugar coated cereal bubble.

You only have one body and it really is a miracle.  What you put into it is really important, that's why for breakfast I'm all about egg whites.  Almost every day I have egg whites and a Thomas Light whole grain English Muffin with smart balance & peanut butter on it (peanut butter is a super food btw).  If I don't have egg whites, I usually have a 0% Fage Greek Yogurt (we talked about this in a blog last week).  Of course I wash it down with a coffee....  BTW are you following my coffee every day on twitter? hmmmmwww.twitter.com/avaaston  @avaaston ;D

I get that kids & even grown ups too like cartoons and all, but I have spent time in the cereal isle, and honestly it is really hard to find even one cereal that is balanced and "good" for you.  It's either too high in sugar, or not enough fiber & protein.... Also the serving size is generally 1/3 of a cup.  We all know that most people do not measure out their cereal before they eat it. So most people are actually eating like 3-4 servings of cereal... this makes for a lot of muckery.  Mood swings, and irritability from not having a balanced breakfast.

So take it from this Rock Chick ~ cereal.... not such a great choice for breakfast.  For me it's all bout being healthy, feeling good and being in shape for performances for my music & acting.  No matter what you do in life, it's important to be the best you can be, and eating a sugary cereal for breakfast is not for champions.  ;D just sayin.  If you absolutely have to have a cereal, best to read the label and make sure it has whole grains & a proper balance of protein, fiber, low sugar, and make sure to measure it.  I use lactose free skim milk, however there are lots of healthy choices for your cereal: almond milk, soy milk, rice milk, whatever floats your cereal boat.  A better choice for a breakfast cereal is steel cut oatmeal, Yummo!

After a Greek Girl approved breakfast you should be all ready to put on your sneakers for a kick butt workout! Go out & have a super spectacular day!

Love & Blessings ~

Ava :D xox

Spend Money Like It's 1999

Goods costing $100 in 1999  would cost $135 today according to the Consumer Price Index

I can see where gas is coming down in price, but not nearly as quickly as it went up. That's just messed up. Unlike gas prices, when grocery store prices go up they never come back down. Hang onto your checkbook and let the Greek girl take you on a shopping trip down memory lane  - circa 1999.

• In 1999 the average cost of a gallon of gas was $1.22
• Average Cost of new house $131,750.00
• Average Income per year $40,810.00
• Average Monthly Rent $645.00
• Average cost of new car $21,050.00
• US Postage Stamp 33 cents
• 1 LB of Bacon $2.59
• Ground Coffee per LB $3.41
• Loaf of Bread $1.49
• Dozen Eggs 89 cents
• Gold was $290 an ounce
• Silver was $5.50 an ounce
• Sony Discman  $69.00 (iPods didn't come out until 2001)
• 2 litre bottle of Pepsi  69 cents
• RCA VCR $99.99 (DVD players were just barely coming out)
• Asparagus  $2.49/lb
• New Balance Sneakers   $77.99 pair
• 2 lb bag of fresh carrots 98 cents

I know the economy is tough when my manager Mr. Bricks also starts pinching pennies. In 1999 a McRib Value meal would set Mr. Bricks back only $2.99.   In some circles (read as in some coffee shops and diners) Mr. Bricks has the nickname of Mr. Big because when not eating McRibs at McDonalds he often tipped well north of 20% when enjoying a meal at a coffee shop or diner. If the waitress laughs at his jokes the tip can be well north of 30% and if the waitress flatters him, ie (have you lost weight? I hardly recognized you Mr. Bricks...or did they fix your eye? It doesn't look as droopy today!) then she could get a 40% tip. Word.

Blessings,

Ava

xox

PS: For all of my Greek friends you will remember that 1999 was a sad year because a powerful, magnitude 5.9 earthquake hit Athens, killing 143 people

How To Beat High Gas Prices Without Losing Your Dignity

Want 99¢ a gallon gas?   Psyche!

It's summer time. So you go to the gas pump and you want to fill up. But then your realize your credit cards are maxed out and you only have $310.43 left in your checking account, which is not enough for a full tank of gas. S0, to help you with the pain at the pump, I have christened myself as the Czar of  High Insane Prices (CHIP). So sit back and allow the Greek girl to help you get through all of this gas price insanity!

Just Say No

When you have that friend who always seems to want to bum a ride to the store or wants you to take them to airport for the 30th time this year, just say no. You just saved $100 by putting the moocher in his place.

Don't Ask, Don't Tell

It's almost summer time. Ride your bicycle to work for a month instead of driving. When your co-workers are gossiping and joking about who might be the pin head who rode their bicycle to work, don't ask, don't tell. Laugh all the way to the bank as you deposit the $250 you saved.

No Kids Left Behind

Sure they can be left behind, just don't forget to feed 'em. I just saved you $400 you would have spent on gas by encouraging you to NOT run errands all summer for your ungrateful kids. Remind them that they can get to where ever they need to go on the mountain bike they "had to have" 3 years ago, but that they never used. When they are whining, (and you know they will) then this is an excellent time to lay into the story about "when you were young..." Feel free to embellish as much as you want (ie, no shoes, walk six miles, no internet or cell phones, walk to school in 3 feet of snow, walked uphill, no food for weeks, etc ) this will help get your point across.

There's No Place Like Home, There's No Place Like Home

And imagine how it'll look when you weed the garden and slap a fresh coat of paint on it, because that's what you can do during your vacation this summer. Why waste all of that money on gas by driving to go see relatives that make your noggin twitch after the 2nd day. Stay home and knock off a few of those home improvement projects you have been putting off since the Bush administration (the first Bush administration).   I just saved you $500 in gas money and $2.99 on money for ear plugs to tune out your weird Uncle Harold.

I'm Lovin' It

And you will be lovin' it to when you just let the CHIP's fall where they may and add up all of the money you saved!

Blessings,

Ava

xox

Pizza - The Other Food Group

Mr. Bricks spent an hour trying to convince me that Pizza was a food group in the Government's new recently unveiled Choose my Plate new food pyramid. He even provided the above photograph as proof that Pizza is a food group that the Government wants us to eat on a regular basis. I'm unsure why he would not know I would realize the image was photoshopped for his benefit. Maybe it's my blonde hair? Could the chemicals be seeping into my noggin, ya think?

I like Pizza just like the next Greek girl does, but I also know the ingredients in Pizza can wreak havoc on a body if you don't work out on a regular basis if you eat a lot of it. I'm not saying I'm perfect, I am just saying I like Pizza ~ but I like my skinny jeans... so, if I eat a little Pizza, I work out a bit more. (Something Mr. Bricks knows nothing about, btw).

No matter what the food in question is when having a conversation with Mr. Bricks, if I like it & it's good for you, it's a sure thing that Mr. Bricks will make a face as if he is about to hurl.  I've tried on many occasions to convince him to eat healthier to no avail.  I tell him he can still have lots of yummy foods, just modified, or if that is not possible that everything in moderation. His reply... "oh so you mean I can have three McRibs per day instead of 5"?  See what I mean?

Some of the ways I make things healthier are pretty simple, but often overlooked. First I always eat every three hours, if not the horns will come out. I used to think it was just part of my Greekness, but I have since learned that your body is actually designed that way.  It's kind of like a fire, you can keep a fire burning by keeping kindling wood on it, but if you put a bunch of big logs onto a fire, the fire will burn out.  Same thing with your body, small meals every three hours while you're awake & you're golden.  It's what those little meals consist of that can lead to lots of Muckery.

The saying "you are what you eat" is really very true (and this may be why Mr. Bricks resembles a Mc Rib sandwich, just sayin).  Sodium is the hidden reason why so many people "think" they are eating healthy and are really not.  Most things have insane amounts of sodium in them, so you really need to check out the labels, especially so called "healthy" fast food.  I try to eat at home to avoid sodium, I stick to lean protein at every meal, lots of salad, and vegetables.  There are a few things I absolutely can not live without, well we already know ~ I'm not giving up coffee ever....  back to the list: Egg Whites, Lowfat Ranch, Olive Oil (teeny drizzles), Morningstar Farms Griller's Original veggie burger, raw almonds, Smart Balance Skim Lactose Free Milk, Fage Greek 0% Yogurt, Steel Cut Oatmeal, Peanut Butter (it's a superfood), Protein powder, tons of water & chocolate... I eat a small piece of chocolate after dinner every day. I like to think of it as my reward for working out so hard.  Oh and baked potatoes, most people stay away from carbs, and yes refined sugars/any sort of white bread you should stay way from.  However, contrary to popular belief potatoes are a super food (just like spinach & Broccoli) and very good for you.  It's what people put on them that can lead to trouble. I like to have lowfat Smart Balance & lowfat Cottage Cheeese on mine, Yummo!

Maybe, that's why Mr. Bricks is going to have to have his own tour bus... Mine will be filled with workout equipment, a treadmill, healthy food, and yes even the occasional slice of pizza.  His will be filled with Diet Coke, McRibs, and anything else salty and the polar opposite of a superfood.

Have a healthy super day.

Blessings!

Ava

xox