Every Cloud Has A Silver Lining

"Every Cloud Has A Silver Lining"

"With the price of silver these days I have decided to sell all of my silver linings." Ava Aston 2011

When I was growing up as a rambunctious little Greek girl my father had a saying that I am sure you all have heard. When anything would go wrong or if something bad happened he would instantly be looking for the positive in those situations. He would tell me,  "Ava, every cloud has a silver lining!" In fact I heard that saying enough growing up that it became engrained in my noggin as one of my positive affirmations. I think that is why I am always positive about almost any situation.

My Dad is a great guy, but he is no poet. I knew he didn't originate the saying. It was actually John Milton who coined the phrase in Comus: A Mask Presented at Ludlow Castlein 1634. Hmm, 1634??? I wonder if Mr. Bricks knows him??

Here are several versions of the quote:

"Every Silver Lining Has A Cloud" - Mary Kay Ash, Creator of Mary Kay Cosmetics

"Too many people miss the silver lining because they are looking for gold" - Maurice Setter

"Every Cloud has its silver lining but it is sometimes a little difficult to get it to the mint" - Don Maquis

"Every silver lining has a touch of gray" - The Grateful Dead

"Clouds may come, but clouds must go, and they all have a silver lining. For behind each cloud you know, the sun, or moon is shining" - anonymous

"Every crowd has a silver lining" - PT Barnum

"Disobedience , n.  The silver lining to the cloud of servitude" - Ambrose Bierce

"Pessimism - Every dark cloud has a silver lining, but lightning kills hundreds of people each year who are trying to find it" - Larry Kersten

"A cloud is just a cloud. Just like if you slap lipstick on a pig it is still a pig" - Mr. Bricks

Leave it to Mr. Bricks for being the Debbie Downer of my positivity post today! It is amazing though that a saying that originated in the 15th century not only survived, but is most likely more popular today that it was when John Milton first wrote it. My Spanish-speaking friends say, No hay mal que por bien no venga. For all of my music loving friends you might remember that  in 20o2 "Silver Lining" was also the title of Bonnie Raitt's 14th album. (She is on my iPod.)

So even if it seems that your life is filled with thunder clouds, and they are all very dark and threatening just remember that if you look close enough you will often see a silver gleam of sunlight trying to poke through!

Blessings,

Ava

xox

Sticks and Stones: Knowing What To Ignore

"I can only be who I am, not who you want me to be"  Ava Aston 2011

In the past I used my Greekness as an excuse. But then there came a time to fess up and come clean. And I did.  Hello, my name is Ava Aston and  I am an ex-approval seeker.

Becoming an approval seeker was part DNA and part occupational hazard. As a Greek American I always told myself I was just being passionate when I became argumentative about someone not liking my music or performance, because after all that's what Greek people do. Even after we eat when we are happy we smash plates. Just imagine if you catch the "Greek Wrath" when we are upset. If you have ever watched the movie, My Big Fat Greek Wedding then you know what I am talking about. It was as if Central Casting went to one of my family's gatherings and cast the entire movie from my gene pool.

Being an approval seeker is also part occupational hazard, because anyone who is in the public eye, and if they are honest, are there partly because of a need for attention. Otherwise, you could never risk the rejection of getting on stage or in front of a camera in the first place. So I admit that me being in the entertainment industry was partly to get approval.

But here is where my Greek noggin got a crossed wire (or two.) My passion (read my Greek heritage) and my need for attention (read my career as a recording artist and actress) collided. If that collision had been left unchecked it would have been very unhealthy for me. There are all kinds of stories of other entertainers turning to alcohol or drugs as a way to combat that same unhealthiness. Not me.

 As much as I wanted the attention, the minute someone was a critic of me or my craft, I wanted to kick their butt, Greek style. I learned very quickly that I had to change otherwise I would have a very quick career. I decided I had to run my own race and not worry about what others thought of me.

Now, I try to keep my blinders on and  focus on my own career, not the career other people or organizations want for me. I want to be a positive role models for young girls and to do that I have had to turn down roles and not do what other pop stars are doing.  It's a slower road, but it's who I am on the inside.  If others disagree with what I say or do, I am fine with it now.

Regular readers of my blog or fans of my cartoon series, Ava the Diva know that I love to make Mr. Bricks out to be a bumbling idiot with a lazy eye. (Oh, before I forget, I want to mention that I think it is hysterical that the term "Lazy Eye" was trending on Google so much the past few days that it made my blog views sky-rocket because I talk about Mr. Bricks' lazy eye so much) Anyway, I do trash talk Mr. Bricks a lot, but it is all in fun. And ok, this is going to sting in my mouth a little for saying this, but seriously Mr. Bricks is a genius. There I said it. Cut-paste-save, because I doubt I will ever say it again.

All along, since my manager Mr. Bricks came aboard the Ava Aston express last July, he has told me not to worry about what others are saying, just keep doing my own thing. Mr. Bricks told me that a critic was like a  legless man trying to teach someone how to run. Graphic I know, but also profoundly true.

I have known ever since I started singing at the age of five I was singing because that is what I was supposed to do, not because I wanted to be famous. Heck, at that young age I didn't even now what fame was. But then somewhere along the line I started to listen to the critics, and despite 100 great reviews, I would let one negative review ruin my day.  I had turned into an approval seeker. I wanted everyone to like me. I thought if I could just convince my critics, then I could unite the world together like a Hallmark Greeting Card or like a Coca-Coal jingle could. I can't.

Alas, I am just a Greek girl and sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me.

Blessings,

Ava

xox

Photo Credit: Ava Aston © 2011 All Rights Reserved.