Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Why Do Old People Expose Themselves

Note to Naked Old People... guidelines for speedo wearing see above.

So my two sisters come into town to visit me over the weekend. Despite the fact that three Greek Girls under one roof is crazy enough, imagine how it is when one of them decides "Hey, we should go to the beach". HELLO... can we say "Muckery Central?..." Sure it's all fun and games until we get there and see an 85 yr. old man in a speedo (and we're not talking about the Jack Lalane type either, and no it wasn't Mr. Bricks ~ Thank you God). This subconsciously leads us all to begin wondering if we look good in a bikini or not? Now of course you can stop asking because yes we do, but it's just a default chip programmed in every girls brain. Greek girls have two of these chips - one for each side.... one for the Baklava and one for the spinach pie - just sayin.

On with the story.... besides the fact that my one sister's psychotic dog, (yes I did say psychotic people, it was actually eating the wall while we were gone) was at home unattended terrorizing my own four fur-kids. Oh to be a fly on the wall at the doggie party... So there we were, sitting there all comfy, blanket down, snacks and iced happiness ready to go, chairs properly positioned to bake ourselves into a golden spender (yes we were wearing sunscreen - no it wasn't olive oil - or made from olive oil extract) and BAM there it goes again. But this time it wasn't a man it was a woman.... wearing a thong bikini old enough to be my grama and lets just say on the very heavy side, she could have been on the senior version of the Biggest Looser ~ just sayin. So just as we blink... we happen to notice that she has not one but two tattoos larger than my head on each side of her butt. No I'm not kidding people. Then comes the highlight of the day: its' a toss up between the super skinny swimmer guy who decides he's gonna take a shower and expose himself in the public sprayer to remove the sand or.... the woman who dove into the water and had both boobs flop out of her top and proceed to act like nothing was wrong. No guys it was not Gisele Bundchen.

Now I'm not saying I don't love old people nor appreciate them, because I do. I adore my yaya and my grama in heaven, and I even sang for nursing homes after classes when I was in high school :D However... What is it about some older people who do not seem to get it that it is not kosher to wear less than Lady Gaga on the beach. I know they say less is more, and this is most often the case, but not so much when you have not kept away father time by taking excellent care of your miracle body like Jack Lalane. Anyone who knows me knows how much I adored the guy and if you are old and you look like that, be my guest wear what you want.

In the words of one of my other fitness hero's Tony Horton "Aging Schmaging, you can get all old and crotchety, or you can be in shape." I donno about you, but I'm going for the latter. Thus my working out like a machine.

Have a blessed day & don't forget the sunblock!

Blessings, Love & Music ~
Ava :D xox

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