Friday, March 18, 2011

The Cover of the Rolling Stone

I was really excited  recently when my manager Mr. Bricks called me and he was all out of breath. I was hoping the one-eyed wonder was panting because of one of two reasons:
  • He decided to work out and had just got done before calling me.
  • He was excited to tell me he had finally got me a record deal.
It was neither.
Turns out that Mr. Bricks was short-winded only because he was so excited to tell me that he had finally found his missing iPod. I didn't even know he had an iPod. But it appears he had misplaced it and it went missing for the better part of two months.  Turns out, it was in the glove box of his car the whole time. I said if he threw away some of the empty diet coke bottles and McDonald's wrappers he would be able to find things in his car. I'm not saying the inside of his car is messy, but it is messy! In fact, if I took pictures of it I could easily get him considered for a new reality series called "Hoarders on the Go" or "Pimp My Hoarder."
Well I was wondering exactly what songs does Mr. Bricks have on his iPod anyway? I was happy to hear that he had my songs on there, and he had some of my favorite bands and artists on it. But he also had a lot of music that was PGG (Pre Greek Girl)...I mean stuff that was being played on the radio way before I was born.
He had a separate playlist for all of this funky 1970's music. One of the artists that caught my attention was named Dr. Hook & The Medicine Show. I said maybe I have heard the name Dr. Hook and I have probably even heard a song or two of theirs, but I don't know any of the songs they sing off the top of my noggin.  And honestly I can't say I have ever heard them called Dr. Hook & The Medicine Show. To me I just always thought they were called Dr. Hook. Dr. Hook & The Medicine Show? Who knew?
Mr. Bricks became really animated when he started talking about Dr. Hook and The Medicine Show, saying he wanted me to hear one of their songs.
The song is called Cover of The Rolling Stone. It's a kind of spoof on the glitzy and glamorous lifestyle of rock stars.  In fact many musicians don't think they have made it until they have appeared on the cover of iconic music industry publication Rolling Stone.  I guess that is true. Once you are on the cover of Rolling Stone it does mean you have arrived in a big way.
Here are the lyrics:
Written by  Shel Silverstein
Ha ha ha I don't believe it
Da, da, ah, ah don't touch it
Hey, Ray, Hey Sugar tell them who we are
Well, we're big rock singers
We got golden fingers
And we're loved everywhere we go (that sounds like us)
We sing about beauty and we sing about truth
At ten-thousand dollars a show (right)
We take all kinds of pills that give us all kind of thrills
But the thrill we've never known
Is the thrill that'll gitcha when you get your picture
On the cover of the rollin stone
(Rollin stone)
Wanna see my picture on the cover
Wanna buy five copies for my mother (yes)
Wanna see my smilin face
On the cover of the rollin stone
(that's a very very good idea)
I got a freaky ole lady name a cocaine Katy
Who embroideries on my jeans
I got my poor ole grey haired daddy
Drivin my limosine
Now it's all decided to blow our minds
But our minds won't really be blown
Like the blow that'll gitcha when you get your picture
On the cover of the rollin stone
(Rollin stone)
Wanna see our pictures on the cover
Wanna buy five copies for our mothers (yeah)
Wanna see my smilin face
On the cover of the rollin stone
Hey, I know how
Rock and roll.....
Ah, that's beautiful
We got a lot of little teenage blue eyed groupies
Who do anything we say
We got a genu wine Indian Guru
Who's teaching us a better way
We got all the friends that money can buy
So we never have to be alone
And we keep getting richer but we can't get our picture
On the cover of the rollin stone
(Rollin stone)
Wanna see my picture on the cover
Wanna buy five copies for my mother (wa wa)
Wanna see my smilin face
On the cover of the rollin stone
On the cover of the rollin
Wanna see my picture on the cover
I don't know why we ain't on the cover, Baby....
Wanna buy five copies for my mother
We're beautiful subjects
Wanna see my smilin face
I ain't kiddin, we would make a beautiful cover
On the cover of the rollin stone
Fresh shot, right up front, Man
I can see it now, we'll be up in the front
Smilin, Man
Ahh, beautiful
Then it came to, I reminded Mr. Bricks that I in fact had heard that song before.  It was featured in the 2000 movie Almost Famous, about a 15-year-old reporter writing an article for Rolling Stone.  The band he is writing about sings the song when they find out they made the cover. Oddly enough, the director of that film, Cameron Crowe, was once a reporter for Rolling Stone. The band Dr. Hook also actually made the cover of Rolling Stone magazine on March 29, 1973, 3 months after this song was released.
Personally I think the real reason Mr. Bricks likes the band so much is that the lead singer, Ray Sawyer wears an eyepatch as the result of almost having been killed in a 1967 car crash in Oregon.  Mr. Bricks secretly wants to wear his own eyepatch to cover up his lazy eye.
Speaking of Mr. Bricks....I think he must have an electrical short in his noggin wires - he told me to do a special March Madness offer on my 10-song CD called "Gone" for the readers of this blog.  So if you want to order my CD, just click on the banner below.

Love & Blessings,
Ava  xox

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