Thursday, June 30, 2011

What If



Einstein is seen here asking, "What if I lick that frozen metal pole?"
"What if...?" A question pondered by all the great Greek philosophers and smart people throughout time, (mostly though they were Greeks who taught others to ask this question.)  Regardless, it's quite the deep thought if you ask me.  The possibilities are endless.  Two words can help cure cancer, inspire greatness, lead to ending hunger or in Mr. Brick's case help decide on if he will wear his circa 1986 high-wasted flare legged white jeans or not.  "What if I wear my white jeans today?" Okay, wait! I gotta stop right there, I just had a mental image that was just really bad for this Greek Girl's noggin. White jeans on Mr. Bricks is like the Pope wearing a speedo or Lady Gaga wearing a turtleneck.  Either way, it's just plain wrong.
Anyway, back to the question at hand.  "What if..?"
It really makes me wonder, "What if Mr. Bricks can actually mentally go deeper than anything other than fastfood?" Here is my impersonation of 5 minutes in the mind of Mr. Bricks as he makes his lunch selection:
"What if McDonald's ever stopped making the McRib?" Would I find a way to survive? "What if McDonald's would make a Green Diet Coke Milkshake?" Maybe I should patent that and sell it to them in exchange for a lifetime of fries.  What if McDonald's joined forces with Slim Jim and made Slim Jim French Fries?" That would be great, then I could have a lifetime of Slim Jim fries of course after I patent that and sell it for a lifetime of McRibs of course.  "What if McDonald's changed the #1 meal deal to be a Double McRib with Slim-Jim fries and a Green Diet Coke Milkshake?"  Then his brain would instantly freeze and he'd become like one of those wax figures in Maddam Tusseau's wax museum. (Side note: no matter how famous I ever get I never want to be embodied in a wax sculpture.  That is by far one of the most creepy things ever invented.)
Okay, like I was saying.  Every great philosopher has always asked "What if?" It is kind of how we get everything around us to be made or invented.  Questions like:
"What if the world were round?" - Columbus 1492
"What if we could travel through time?" - Einstein 1930's (still working on this one)
"What if I could walk on the moon?" - Neil Armstrong 1960
"What if we protest the tax on tea?" - American Patriots 1776
"What makes this apple fall to the ground instead of float away?" - Newton 1500's
"What if we gave peace a chance?" - John Lennon  1969
"What if we could make tasty delivery pizza?" - Papa John 1984
"What if we sell coffee in Styrofoam cups?" - Mr. Donut 1956
Sometimes I ask, "What if Mr. Bricks DID get me a record deal?" Then I would be able to buy all those glorious new sneakers I got my eye on.  Or "What if John Rzeznik from the Goo-Goo Dolls were to produce my next album?" Then I would most definitely have my first, second and third Grammy in no time.  This leads me to ask "What if I do become really famous, will they make one of those creepy wax sculptures of me anyway?" My goodness I hope not.
Have a blessed day,
Ava
xox
PS ~ What if you passed on this blog on to 5 of your best friends?

1 comment:

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